you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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