i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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