the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
