I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
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