What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
