You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize