Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
