Plan B is the new Plan A
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
