Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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