So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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