Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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