i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
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