Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
