summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
