the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
