were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
