I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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