Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
She tied me up with her honor cords...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Randomize
