No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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