He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Randomize
