Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
