physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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