she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
