I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
