She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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