Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Sorry about my life...
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
