idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
How external is "for external use only"?
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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