bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
