Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
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