Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
