I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize