he referred to my room as the tit cave...
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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