this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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