Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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