Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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