I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize