yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
