But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
what is it with giant penises always finding me
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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