This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Randomize
