So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
