One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
