Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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