Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
