At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
