I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
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