As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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