I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
