people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize