this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
