You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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