You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
im about as happy as oj after his trial
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
